“I let other people’s opinions stop me getting the help I needed. I was held back by stigma.”
I learned about addiction as a child, it was all I had ever known. I grew up in a working-class town, and drinking was all around me. I thought it was what everyone else did. By the age of 21, I began to realise that something was wrong; I felt different somehow.
I struggled through life as a single parent and functioned by working full-time. My body and mind worked on autopilot until my next drink.
14 years passed before I realised I needed to take action. I reached out to Change Grow Live in Stockton on Tees, thinking this step would mean I was ready to change, but I was only going through the motions.
The biggest mistake I made was not telling anyone about my addiction. None of my friends or family knew just how deep I had fallen.
I even hid it from my partner, going so far as shredding parking tickets so he didn’t know where I had been. It’s safe to say that I failed at achieving sobriety.
I let other people’s opinions of addiction stop me from getting the professional help I so desperately needed. I was held back by stigma.
Overcoming the stigma
Eight more years went by, and I hit rock bottom. I was literally sick of being sick. My life wasn’t my own anymore; alcohol had a firm grip on me.
I knew I needed to change, and I finally realized that only I have the power to make things happen.
In 2021, I knew the game was up; my first step was talking to my family; how could they support me if they didn’t know I needed help? They supported me to Change Grow Live, Stockton.
I entered the service building a broken woman. However, I found support there as people walked alongside me, guiding me on the path to recovery.
I learned new coping skills and strategies, prioritised my own wellbeing, and discovered a new way of living, what I can only describe as a ‘rebirth’ into a substance-free life.
I made connections and built a new network - my recovery family.
My confidence grew, and suddenly, I felt very comfortable talking about my recovery. The stigma, previously a barrier for me, was now my driving force.
Spreading the word about recovery
I became very passionate about spreading the word. I wanted to tell the world that not only is recovery possible, but it’s also life-changing and beautiful. I wanted to help break the stigma around addiction and substance misuse.
The only way I knew to do this was to share my story. I decided to write a memoir about my recovery. My book “No Drink for Me” was released in September 2024 and is available in both digital and paper formats.
This was a huge decision for me, but if it helps just one person then I will have achieved my goal. Help is out there; you just need to reach out and put one foot in front of the other.”